This space...

Its been 18 months since I have written in this space and I don't even know where to start in order to catch up.  Perhaps a top 12 from 2012? I stopped writing for no reason at all except we got busy and life got messy and it was hard to write without sharing the mess.  New jobs, sad days, missing my friends back home, vacations, family brokenness.  Pictures are better for now!  :) So if anyone is out there, here a few favorites from 2012:

So nothing fancy or edited...just slapping it on here to maybe get a fresh start.  Tomorrow, 2013?

A New Year

A new year brings feelings of hope, a time to start over...we all think about the things we want to do better in the new year.  365 brand new days to do something completely different than we did with the previous.  I am a sucker for new beginnings.  I love a new calendar, a new school year, birthdays and of course a new year.  Last years was so new to us as a whole, new state, new church, new job and new friends.  This year will be much of the same.  Our state is still new to us and there is still so much to see!  Our church is experiencing lots of new changes as our pastor and his family are relocating to Georgia, they happen to be one of the families we have been the closest to here so we are sad for the loss but so thrilled for their new adventure in a new state.  Bloggers all over the internet are establishing a word for the year: "What is your word for 2012?" I don't have one.  I can't pick just one for fear of hurting the other ones feelings...they are all so good!  I even found it hard to pick resolutions...aren't they the same ones we have each year?

Exercise more
Eat better
Get out of debt
Have fun as a family
Read the bible
Do school everyday
Organize
Live Simply
Grow a garden
Read more books


Yep, pretty much the same ones.  So it wasn't as fun to sit down and make them...this time.  Maybe next year will be more fun?  It's been a hard few years with job losses and all that comes with that.  It's been hard to trust that it will all be okay and I find myself falling into the thoughts of a pessimist, salted with some optimism to make sure that I don't fall all the way to the bottom of the pessimist trap.  That's not where I want to be.  My mother lived there and she suffered in her life and relationships because of it so I fight everyday, when we aren't sure where the work is coming from, when we are not sure of anything at all...I keep remembering the good.  Giving thanks for all, each and every little thing.  Because isn't the little things that make up this whole thing we call life?

I don't know what this year holds for us.  That's the hardest part.  The not knowing can be a wicked place.  At one time for me the not knowing was an adventurous place but the adventure has repeated itself so many times that I have tired of it and I just want a solitary place for us to dwell.

Dwell.

verb: to live as a resident.
synonyms: abide, exist, nest, remain


How's that for a word?

Twirling Ballerina: this is what my head
feels like most days.

We all wear hats.  These are mine:

• Wife
• Mother
• Daughter
• Friend
• Teacher
• Housekeeper (don't laugh.)
• Cook
• Nurse
• Seamstress (a beginning one.)

and the list could go on.

With our move my hats have been so jumbled and I can't decide which one to wear at any one time.  I think I look like a crazy version of the Caps for Sale character and his encounter with all those monkeys.  On top of that I am suddenly opposed to clutter and not so sure how to combat it.  We are in, have been in a perpetual cycle of purging, simplifying and the saga continues.  But, where to start?  It's all in chaos and I was looking for a starting place and somehow a rabbit hole led me to this website, a place called Zen Habits and he has written an awesome list!  It's long and overwhelming and he gives a simplified version for those that can't look at all 72.  But I wanted it all so I started at number 1....

1.  Make a list of your top 4-5 important things. What’s most important to you? What do you value most? What 4-5 things do you most want to do in your life? Simplifying starts with these priorities, as you are trying to make room in your life so you have more time for these things.  

Leo Babauta, Zen Habits

 So I am not thinking about the garage and all the organizing that needs to be done (we have done enough for now), or the quilt that remains to be finished (it will be).  I am starting at the top, getting my goals down, the important things with which I can then base other choices on.  How awesome is that?  I have been making a weekly schedule so that the house stuff doesn't loom and a daily schedule so that we fit it all in, the important stuff.  The creating, the togetherness...the stuff that matters to me.  It all goes by so quickly and I don't want to miss it, and I already have so my goal is to miss less.

Right now I am sitting somewhere between four and eight on the list, working out tasks for the day, shredding my inbox down to a manageable size and trying so hard to limit my time on the computer.   I feel less overwhelmed, like I have a plan in front of me that will take me through the steps needed to get a grip on this thing called LIFE.  The last few years has taken a toll through unemployment, family health issues and now a huge move...I am trying to get my groove back, although I am not sure I possessed it to begin with.

Water fell from the sky!   So we needed to catch some, since it may be awhile before it happens again.
So thankful.

:)

Epic Fail

Maleiah got it in her head that she was going to curl her hair.  With a comb.  Around and around it went, and that my friends is where it stayed.

Until we cut it out.  Luckily the "layers" blend right in and no one is the wiser.  Well, she may be wiser.

Now

We really haven't been doing anything really exciting but the adventure surely continues.  Right now I am in the kitchen watching over a tortilla that slowly cooks in some butter on the stove.  The beans are warming so we can enjoy some bean burritos for lunch, Caeden's favorite.  It's summer for most kids in Katy and we are pushing on, making up for lost time during the chaos of moving to a new state.  Our new schedule is working out great and some stuff gets canceled for something more important but mostly we are getting it done.  Caeden skipped ahead 5 lessons in spelling and Maleiah is plowing ahead on her letter sounds.  Math is getting done although we are still playing catch up.  I think this will give him a better foundation since we are slowing it down so we know he understands all the concepts.  We love science and history and I am looking forward to actually planning out our next year but I am holding off so we can complete what we are in now.


Now is so vital, so we don't miss anything.  Like blowing bubbles.  Isn't that a rite of passage of some kind, maneuvering that bubble gum around your tongue and making a bubble only to have it pop on your face?

Our back patio was covered with June Bugs last night, completely.  It was gross and they just sat there, like gathering for a meeting that would result in giving me the heebie-jeebies.  Success!

Justin and I have been able to go on a few date nights.  We have been swapping with another couple from our church.  It's been nice to have some time out without the kids as well as the kids having time with friends.  This couple has a pool which the kids LOVE and this will likely be a place we spend lots of time this summer.  As well as beaches.  Beaches so close and warm that it reminds me of home and summers with friends, camping, parties and kids in trees.

As I was leaving the house last week and as I was closing the door I noticed Buzz Lightyear was trying to ride after us on his horse.  

Weather Question of the Day

Questions from the jar.  Caeden finds the answer and writes about it in his journal.

"Fire Ants on a log!" ~ Caeden

A few things we have been reading:

Dave Ramsey (a fellow Texan), basically all of his books have been on our coffee table over the past few weeks.  We have listened to a few of his radio shows via iTunes podcasts and also finding all we can online.  My favorite find so far has been Simple Mom's rundown of all the steps to financial peace.  She is one of my favorite bloggers anyway and this has been a personal success for them.

Believing God by Beth Moore (another fellow Texan!)...just needed something for personal enrichment and I picked her because she is funny and I love hearing her talk so as I am reading I hear all the intonations of her voice and it makes me laugh although it is a serious book so I probably shouldn't be laughing????  But I am and believing more.

And here is a video, proof of the bubble (it's a much better show when it's Bubblicious, but we were out), the now that shouldn't be missed.

A Little Something I Believe In

I am not a political person AT ALL, let me say that first, but I do have a husband who is a skilled worker and I am proud of what he does.  So I am happy that Mike Rowe is doing what he does for the blue collar workers in America and speaking on behalf of all of them!

Here is a the statement he read before the Senate and here is a video of that statement.

We started back to school this week and it has been so awesome to get back to some normalcy.  We started out the week with a science experiment from our Swimming Creatures book (I love this curriculum...love, love, love...).  We have been reading about whales, dolphins, sea lions, seals and walruses.  Our experiment was to see how blubber keeps these sea creatures warm.  On one hand Caeden put two latex gloves on and on the other hand he also put two latex gloves on except that in between the two gloves was a lot of Vaseline to act as a layer of blubber. He only made it 30 seconds longer on the "blubber" hand but he did say that right away it was warmer.  We didn't have a lot of Vaseline and I am sure if we had used the recommended amount (1-2 inches thick!) the results would have turned out differently.  In the end it was worth the slippery mess, Caeden loves science and loves the experiments.

Also for science, we finally made an ocean box!  The instructions were to cover a box in blue paper but I thought painting it blue would be more fun and Maleiah could participate more.  After each lesson, of which we have already had 2, we will make a sea creature that we have learned about and add it to the box.  In the end, we will have a sea creature diorama.

And there was writing, fractions and lots of reading.  We have backed up a bit in our studies of the Middle Ages and I love the book we are using for that too.  We went to the preschool park day through our homeschooling group and there are a lot of kids, boys and girls of all ages so both of the kids are making friends.  I like the moms at the group, they are friendly and a few of them sew which makes me feel like I may find a place to fit.  Tonight I am going to meet some other moms from the same group for dessert at Fuddruckers here in Katy.  Never been before, but I am looking forward to both: a new place and new people.

Settling

Things are settling in slowly but surely.  The kitchen is gradually getting unpacked and put into new places and all the beds are ready and awaiting tired bodies at the end of the day.  On Sunday we went to church around the corner from our house and it is small but very friendly.

"Can we bring you meals?"
"Can we organize an unpacking crew?"
"I have a 10 year old, we can play!"

...and the best was when we were leaving and Katy, age 5, ran to Maleiah and they hugged each other to say goodbye.  I laughed because now Maleiah has a little friend of her very own.  It melted me.

On Monday we visited the library!  We all got cards and with each card we can check out 75 books.  Do the math.  That's a lot of books people.  I am a happy girl. :)  Caeden left with an arm load (only because we didn't bring a bag to fill) and I left with some cookbooks that I am already excited to put to the test.



Yesterday we played in the front yard for the first time ever!  We have always lived on a busy street or on a corner and I never felt like it was safe for the kids to ride bikes, play or whatever fun you can have in the front yard of your house that can't be had in the back.   It was so nice.  I read a magazine and took pictures.  The kids raced, found bugs, made bouquets and Maleiah danced a fantastic recital right in the driveway.

Today we went to Houston for an Interactive Theater production of Robin Hood for children.  The kids loved it and we survived the freeway drive!  Caeden even got to be shackled and rescued by "Little John" during the show, he really enjoyed that.  We are looking forward to attending more of their productions next year!

Good news: on the drive home we saw a sign, a very important one...

Jo-anns 

Coming Soon 

So excited to have one close, although I love that there are other options for fabric and crafty stuff that I will be exploring soon!

Packing a trailer for a long move like this is a lot like playing Tetris except that there are no points, just your belongings in one piece.  Justin, his dad and some friends helped with the loading and cleaning out of the house.  We paid for 21 feet of a 28 foot trailer and our goal was to get our stuff in under the 21 but that didn't happen.  We sent a van load of things to store at my father-in-laws barn but most of it fit in the footage we paid for.  We went with ABF Freight and I have had nothing but a great experience!  We priced other truck companies but once we added fuel costs for a truck that size and our Explorer it would have been about the same as ABF.  So we went with someone else driving our stuff and we get to go on this road trip together which is a total win in my book.

We said goodbye to family and friends over the weekend and it was bittersweet.  So happy to move forward, yet so sad to leave so much behind.  I don't know what I would do without technology, it will be a huge blessing to be able to use Facebook, Skype, e-mail and this blog as a way to stay connected.

We stocked up on lots of snacks, and the kids were given so many fun things to do on the trip to keep them preoccupied.  I made my last trip to Trader Joe's and purchased 8 jars of peanut butter and a few other non-perishables.  That's one of the conveniences that I will miss the most!  We did all of our shopping at TJ's and there are zero in Texas...but it's a Whole Foods nation we will see what kind of experience I can have there.  :)

We also dug for worms...

Today, we left on time...that never happens and we headed to Visalia to visit my friend and then headed on to Indio, CA!  We stopped at the Grapevine and the kids were great.  Maleiah kept herself busy with stickers, markers and crayons.  Caeden got some new Star Wars books to read and a Melissa & Doug License Plate Puzzle.  We told him that for every state license plate he found we wold give him a dollar.  He has to tell us where he saw it and then flip over the license plate and read to us the capital of that state.  He's learning and earning which works for both of us.  :)

Maisie (our dog) was prescribed a sedative but she has been so great and we haven't needed to use them.  She quivers every once in awhile but I think she believes that we aren't dropping her off anywhere.

I can't believe that tomorrow I will be in another state(actually 2!).  It's all so surreal and I don't really know what to make of it all yet.  As we get closer I am sure the anticipation of something new will be stronger and the reality of distance will hit too.  Lord, let there be a Pepsi nearby.  :)

Let the Packing Begin!

Actually the packing began three months ago but today the trailer gets packed.

Justin is on a plane RIGHT NOW and in just a little over 2 hours we will be picking him up at the airport!  

Friends are coming, family are coming to help with the loading and the rest of the packing that needs to be done.  All the random that has been saved for this weekend, all the last things that we are still using.  Moving is a lot of work and although I have always embraced a a move for the sake of purging (and acquiring) this move has been harder.

I have no pictures because our camera is uncooperative, turning off as soon as I turn it on so we are hoping to pick a simple (translated=inexpensive!) one up today!  Wish me luck.  :)

To be continued...

I wrote this awhile ago but wanted to post it anyway....

In 3 weeks we will be on our way to our new home in Texas!  The time right now is bittersweet as we pack, purge and spend as much time with our family and friends as we can squeeze in and at the end of the day it isn't enough.  For the first time in my life I will live nearly 2000 miles away from home.  From the place I have known for 37 years, the familiar paths and places that have been rooted in my memories and make me partly who I am.  It is surreal, these moments.

My brain is a mess of lists, thoughts, hopes, plans and fears.  My friends deal with me and I laugh at myself nearly everyday.  At this moment there is not one clean room in the house BUT my kitchen sink is clean today and that makes me smile.  :)  I learned today that disposals don't really love clumps of sprouts being shoved down it's pipes.  Apparently it acts as a plug and then you have green sprout soup coming up, up, up into the sink.  It's gross, trust me.  Don't do it.  I also learned how to take the pipes under the sink apart and fix it which made me feel like SUPERWOMAN.  It was pretty awesome.  But it was a mess and that wasn't so awesome.  

This weekend I am going out with friends to have drinks, coffee, chat and knit.  To laugh at the past and look ahead to the future.  To secure connections that are deep and store up what I need to get me there.  

I am excited for the new:

• a new place to call home
• new trees to climb
• new rooms to decorate
• new shelves to fill
• new books that are coming
• new spaces to fill
• new fabric to sew
• new people to meet
• new memories to make

Tomorrow Justin comes home and we begin loading a trailer and next week we begin a 4 day journey to our new home.  More to come...

It's been almost a year since Justin was laid off from what we called the "best job ever" and we are embarking on a new journey that has us both completely baffled.

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, 

neither are your ways my ways,” 

declares the LORD. 

“As the heavens are higher than the earth, 

so are my ways higher than your ways 

and my thoughts than your thoughts."

Isaiah 55:8-9

Hundreds of resumes.
Four interviews.
One job offer.
Texas.

The job offer wasn't even a job he interviewed for.  It's his previous employer ("the best boss ever"), the one he was laid off from in 2009.  We said no in July but threw it back on the table in December and it looked different this time.  It still made no sense, why would we go that far away?  Our family, friends, all we have is here in California.  But how long can Justin not work, stay in our house and not lose his mind?  He needs to work, build things, accomplish things.  And truth be told, we need the money.  Still we have no idea why God would send us nearly 1900 miles away, but we are trusting Him, believing Him.  Excitement is coming, intermingled with fear of the unknown.  Sadness grips in the thoughts of being far from family and friends and then peace knowing nothing truly separates our hearts.

All over the blogosphere there are words being chosen and held on to.  Words for 2011.  Sometimes better than goals, resolutions, a word that helps us stay focused and grounded.  Reminding us of what is important.  And I am among them, choosing a word that will define my year.

YES.

What things will I say "Yes" too?  All the things I said "No" to last year.

"No" I won't play a game, come outside, go for a walk, paint a picture, build with Lego's, go to the park....

and the list goes on.

I want to invite magic and celebration into my life this year.  Taking it all in and laughing all the way and I think YES has a lot to do with it.  Texas is part of that this year and though I stubbornly want to kick and scream the whole 1900 miles I know God's in it and that doesn't glorify Him.  So, Yes, we go and it will be hard, that's no lie, but we are gonna do it with a happy heart (as I often tell my children).

YES 2011!

A Messy Life...

A failed history project. :)

Our life just got a bit messier.  Messy in a good way with some not so good mixed in there too.  We just added two teenagers to our life and we seriously have no idea what we are doing.  Amidst job searching, possibly losing our home and ... well, we homeschool.  So it's messy.  I now have a junior higher and a high schooler that I am taking and picking up from school, and with that all the drama that comes with caring for teenage girls.  Particularly girls who haven't been parented in a positive way.  But they are family and we go way back so it was natural to just take them, love them and hope that it works.

So far it's hard but good.  Good because I feel like this is what I was meant to do.  Good because I am up early everyday (now if I can just start getting up at 6 am instead of 6:30 am I might not have a 4 year old following me down the hall... wishful thinking?).  Good because the girls are safe.  Hard because, they are teens.  Enough said.

I have been sewing and knitting, making plans for birthdays and the holidays.  Maleiah turned 4 in October and Caeden turns 9 next week.  Justin and I both have birthdays in November too so it's festive and around every corner is a party.






School is going well.  We scrapped a lot of what we planned to do with Maleiah and she is thriving since we have let her go at her own pace.  It's more fun watching her learn and do things when she is ready rather than forcing it.  She copied her name the other night and I couldn't help but beam and perhaps even shriek.  Justin is taking a math class in hopes of joining an electricians apprenticeship.  Caeden is reading everything in sight and we only have 25 more lessons in his second grade math so we can move on to third!  This is so exciting and now that we are set on Saxon we are seeing the fruit of that decision.

 We have friends moving away, two families we have been very close to these last few years and we are heartbroken yet excited for their journey.  Things are changing for us all around and that makes our hearts messy too.  But we know God is doing something in our midst so we keep waiting with hopeful anticipation for what happens next.

Life is messy but we are embracing it.

Chalk drawings

Building a marshmallow/cereal castle for history.

Our summer was filled with the chaos of our life right now yet sweetened by friends and getaways sprinkled in between.   We began the summer in Pismo Beach with friends camping by the dunes and watching our kids ride bikes for hours, for days with no TV!

We had a summer solstice party to celebrate the coming season and because I needed a reason to have a party, dress things up, cook yummy food and take pictures of my friends {which they hate}.

We have had so much fun in our backyard this summer!  Ladybugs, dragonflies, hawks and spiders.  Butterflies hatched in their bungalow and nests were found buried under brush in the yard.  Hummingbirds visit at the feeder and veggies are growing in the garden amongst praying mantis' that are amazing to watch when captured for a few days. :)  It became a place where kids put on plays and boys {and girls} swing from trees.

Best friends were made.

We drove out of town this year more than ever before.  We wanted to see water.  We wanted to be able to think clearly.  So we headed to murky lakes and called it beautiful just so we didn't have to sit in our house for one more minute.  We drove to places we thought we loved and revised what we thought we loved about it and promised to try again next year but with a different plan.  And we drove to the ocean because as always, the best ideas are formed near big blue.   We stayed in the worst hotel ever but the kids thought it was awesome and I mean"AWESOME!" Like they wanted to stay longer and not go anywhere because they thought it was so great and I just didn't want to touch anything or take a shower, if you know what I mean.  

But, we were on a budget so we soaked in the kids happiness and took them to get a soft serve. 

We drive over the state line and took pictures.  Our kids in Nevada!  

Oh, heck... whoever says that?  

We do.

I swore that this summer I would not sit in front of a computer screen preparing for a school year that changed one month in like last year and for the most part I stuck to that.  I did very little planning which helped me feel like we are in a good place as far as homeschooling goes.  I like what we are using {it still gets tweaked every now and then} but I feel like we have found a groove.... that is often disrupted by a pretty little blond thing that just wants to do school too!

 It's the first day of autumn, the season I was born in and L.O.V.E.  We have spent so much of the last 8 months wondering what comes next for us.  Looking for work has turned up interesting possibilities for our family.

{Texas?  No.}

California has so little in terms of work for Justin yet it holds so much in terms of friends and family.  We are willing to go where there is work and right now that is venturing north, to states I have never been but look so appealing.  We send resumes out daily {here, there, everywhere...}, waiting for something, even if it's just a "thanks but no thanks".  Looking for work is hard these days.  Employers don't call back or email back and in this economy are not willing to pay what a man is worth.  It is disheartening.  We trudge forward, hoping for the best and putting our faith in a God that sees and knows all things.  Whew!  Am I glad for that, since I know nothing.  :)

Ta-ta for now, I have girl who needs waking.